Tag: culture

Trendy Teens (Part 2 of 2)

Continued from last week’s Trendy Teens (Part 1 of 2):

Another key way to engage with students is to control our atmosphere! While none of us can always control every situation and decision our teens make, we can control the atmosphere in our homes and church youth groups, and atmosphere is everything!

In Jim Burns book, Teen-ology he says; “While no home is perfect, and you will experience conflict with your teens – Here’s the deal: I don’t think we should solely blame our kids for the chaos in the home. Their “job” as teenagers is bound to cause some chaos and conflict. They are experimenting with behaviors, challenging authority, and generally doing things to mess up any positive atmosphere around them. Your job in the home is to set a tone and atmosphere that is more conductive to a better environment in the family. (It’s not going to be easy). If your family is living at too fast of a pace, or if your own life is filled with chaos and conflict, don’t expect your teens to set a positive atmosphere in your home. And don’t expect communication to be all that good either. It’s back to the intentional parenting of teens by staying calm, working a plan, and getting as emotionally healthy as YOU possibly can. To set a better atmosphere you will need to 1) be intentional 2) sometimes have to decide when certain behaviors and choices are just not worth a battle. (If your children see you as constantly nagging or criticizing them, don’t expect them to enjoy hanging out with you).”

Research is still showing that parents are the biggest influence in their teen’s life. Parents have the opportunity to make the biggest impact in their teen’s decisions. While we as adults can’t always control the decisions teens make regarding drug use, sex and friend choices, we can control the way we engage with the culture around us. We have power, through the Holy Spirit, to help our teens to be rooted and established in love, and not rooted in the popular trends all around them. It is messy work, but our teens are too important to ignore. Engage in their world and remind them of “real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of”.

Trendy Teens (Part 1 of 2)

Looking back on the trendy fashion, music and entertainment from the 60’s and beyond, one common thread remains; it was the teens that were the “trend-setters.” If we look at the current trends in music, technology and entertainment, it is teens that are still influencing trends today. Therefore, as loving, caring, faith-filled adults, how should we respond to cultural trends from a Christian perspective?

Let’s first look at how Jesus interacted with and responded to culture. I love the way Brian Housman describes the way Jesus interacted with the culture around him in his book Engaging Your Teen’s World. He writes, “Jesus came to heal and renew what sin has infected – by revelation and instruction he (Jesus) reattaches the soul to God the source of its being and goodness and restores it to the right order of love.” Notice those verbs; Renew, Reattaches, Restores. He doesn’t ignore, or respond in panic or fear.

Unlike Jesus, our first response is too often to reject or ignore tough questions and hard battles. However the best way to deal with issues of culture (music, tech, entertainment) is to engage!

Look at the story in John 10:6-10 where Jesus is the Good Shepherd. The Message says it like this; Jesus told this simple story, but they (the disciples) had no idea what he was talking about. So he tried again. “I’ll be explicit, then. I am the Gate for the sheep. All those others are up to no good—sheep stealers, every one of them. But the sheep didn’t listen to them. I am the Gate. Anyone who goes through me will be cared for—will freely go in and out, and find pasture. A thief is only there to steal and kill and destroy. I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of.”

“Will freely go in and out”—Notice Jesus doesn’t lock up the sheep. Dead bolt the gate shut! Keep the sheep completely sheltered, in hiding. John Rosemond, that man who coined the phrase “helicopter parent” says this; “Too many parents are ultimately carrying the burdens of their teen’s problems on their own shoulders. No teen will become a responsible adult if their parents carry the load for them. It’s not healthy for either party!”

So then, how do we engage without taking on our kid’s burdens? Whatever you do, don’t stay silent. Silence will often lead teens to jump to feeling of shame! Things so terrible we dare not mention them. When we try to engage, too often we ask simple (yes or no) questions. Then we’re surprised or disappointed when all we get is a simple yes/no/fine answer. Instead, begin your questions with phrases such as, “What do you think about…” or “How do you feel about…” These are open-ended questions, and can be quite helpful. Try them. They work!

To be continued…

True Religion – More than Justice

[Adapted from Session 3 of the 2014 Theme Material]

 

We all love a story in which the dark and ugly turns glorious and good. A story where a creature so hideous no one dared look on it turns into a handsome prince, the cowardly lion takes courage and protects others, Cinderella rises from the mop bucket to become queen and rule kindly, Pinocchio turns into a real boy, Scrooge becomes generous . . . they become everything they never thought they could be – transformed.

 

As humans we love stories of transformation where a person is not just improved but made new. The story of mankind that God is writing does not end with justice but with transformation.

 

Micah 6:8 was written to people in need of transformation. Though the book’s tone is one of judgment, the theme of restoration cannot be missed. The God of all creation sees and cares about the most vulnerable and weak. He cares enough to warn his own people that they are also vulnerable and weak. He urges them and we are urged to be humble, to love mercy and to be just. That is, in fact, required by God.

 

Maybe the simplest way to increase humility and mercy is to intentionally grow in justice. While only God can transform he has clearly stated what he requires from us. Justice is:

  • Straight Forward: In Isaiah 1 and Micah 5 there are basic commands: stop doing bad and selfish things and do good. Take care of the weak, lift up the poor, free the oppressed and feed the hungry.
  • A Way of Life: God wants justice – not in fits and starts or here and there. God wants justice to permeate, penetrate and restore people. He wants justice to refresh the weary, to ease the thirst of the downtrodden. God wants justice to wash away injustice. He wants it to soak in and nourish our relationship with one another. Like a never-ending river, God wants justice to flow day and night
  • Us, Not “Us and Them”: Unfortunately, we often take on a rescuers mentality, but the people we serve are able to teach us much about life and they bear the image of Almighty God. They are to be valued and their skills, gifts and abilities understood to better the community. See https://vimeo.com/25101770.
  • Using the chainsaw first and then, maybe, the tweezers: We have to confront the beam in our own eye (Luke 6:42). Jesus’ admonition has an almost instant humbling effect reminding us we are in need of transformation.

 

Our culture of consumerism and greed set us up as “haves and have-nots”. This attitude must not be transferred into our pursuit of a just life. In fact, justice in not what we eagerly await but transformation by God’s grace and Christ’s work. The gospel brings us the opportunity, desire and power to adhere to God’s requirements of humility, mercy and just living.

 

As mortals we are, by God’s grace and through the work of Christ, being moved from darkness into his light. He is causing us to take courage and teaching us to rule kindly in his kingdom. Part of us must love those stories of transformation and truly find fulfillment in helping others because we long to see God’s complete work in our own lives and world.

 

For real life stories of how the Gospel is transforming lives around the world be sure to check out World Renew’s website at worldrenew.net.

 

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